They brought in giant dehumidifiers and blowers when the leak was discovered. Day and night for five days those machines disrupted our quiet in our upstairs bathroom, downstairs office area and even in the crawl space under the house. The. Noise. Was. Incessant.
But we knew it had to be. That was in July. Overwhelm came next with all the choices and decisions I needed to make. Where does one begin? I ran all over Charlotte searching for just the right wall paint. That pushed the project back. (Later I learned paint would be the final decision.) It took several weeks to connect with a young mom design team in our neighborhood. Then I realized I needed a contractor. The work finally began in early November. With their schedule, holiday breaks and delays, the bathroom was mostly finished in mid January. “Relieved” was the operative word after six months of major disruption. Then …
Three days ago a leak was discovered in our laundry room area adjacent to our kitchen. A pipe inside the wall was repaired and flooring was torn out. We knew the drill. The blowers arrived again that evening. Blessed relief came this morning. I continue to marvel at the profound internal calming effect of QUIET. Not only is quiet a more pleasant atmosphere, it’s actually healthy! According to neuroscientists, our physical bodies thrive when we can maintain a balance between the emotion of joy and the calm of quiet.
God designed “Joy” to be the fuel running our brains (that “I’m sooo glad to be with you” ~ full of gratitude emotion). And He gave us Quiet as the “recovery” phase of our positive or negative emotions and a necessary component in all good relationships. It is the soul restoring place He’ll lead us to if we pay attention to His guidance. When a family learns to quiet together, enjoying each other in moments of sweet silence, relationships are strengthened. Being able to quiet our body during upset is the best predictor of good mental health for a lifetime. Yes, it’s that important.
I had been practicing quieting for years when I was in a coffee shop with a friend and her children. I was eager to show her a new book I thought she’d enjoy. But things didn’t go well. Though she also loves the Lord, she had misunderstood the book’s premise. She sharply spoke up believing the book to be not theologically sound. She was visibly angry. I was surprised to find her speaking at full volume across our narrow table in that very public place. My strong reaction started to come forward. I felt tension in my shoulders, a knot in my stomach; and I’m pretty sure my cheeks turned pink. Because I knew how to quiet, I instinctively and discreetly took a deep breath to control my physical body’s response. I mentally connected with Jesus and asked for His help. I asked, “Lord, how do you see her?”
Just then, I remembered something about her childhood that prompted me to have compassion. My body relaxed. I was able to remain calm and stay engaged. When she finished, I simply smiled and said, “Well I guess we’ll disagree on this book.” Then I carried on in kindness as I knew Jesus would do if He were me. When it was time to leave I walked them to their car. Interestingly, the importance of quieting was in one chapter of the book.
She and I are even better friends today. “…in quietness and trust is your strength.” Isaiah 30:15b
